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The Past is Still Recorded Online

This blog is out of use and out of date. I am now posting on mercedesorten.blogspot.com

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Escaping Boulder: Can you live in Non-existence?

Such is life
"Oh, you had some good times" ~Vincent C. Yes, we did. College was great. It sounds so weird to say that in past-tense, but it truly was. So many memories, I do not know if my mind can hold them all for as long as I'd like it to.

Such is life. This is all going to end soon. This kind of life of college themed prom cocktail 80s parties, going out til 5, 6, 7 am, 'till the sun comes up, sneaking into swimming pools, doing dirty things in people's back yards, drinking beer at 2pm, cooking breakfast at midnight, running through the streets in the rain, staring at each other in the dark, night hiking in the moonlight, freeloading, dancing next to cars with the music blaring, etc. And I think I'm finally ready for it to stop. Since I've lately been talking to some my good friends who are also moving on with their lives, I have begun to feel better about my coming decisions. I now have stopped feeling guilty for escaping Boulder and I have started feeling excited for the job-changes and life-changes to come! "Escaping Boulder" really sounds like a play or a movie title, doesn't it? There are so many implications behind that phrase. "Is it symbolic, Mercedes?" ~Kendell K. No, not really. But it implies that Boulder is a place where one can only stay for a short period of time. It implies that Boulder gets worn out but at the same time Boulder holds onto you and forces you to have to escape it, run away quickly so you don't look back too many times. It is like Jessie says "[y]ou can't live in non existence." Can you escape non-existence, though? My lease is ending on August 12. And with that end goes my existence in Boulder. I am going to be forced to escape something I love. Again, my mind is running into one of those "open contradictions." And is that a blunder or what? Is it possible to escape something you love? I'm going to try, even if it takes all the theory that is still locked up there in my brain for me to do it. Anyone ready to help me out? I wish I could tell you how much I could use that help.

Read Hughes, his poem goes along with this post

Current book I'm reading: "Must Love Dogs" by Claire Cook
Current song stuck in my head: Phil Collins "Both Sides"
Final thought: Warm weather kicks my butt, but I love it.


  • At 6:37 PM, August 03, 2005, Blogger Andrew said…


  • At 2:12 PM, August 04, 2005, Blogger Carrie Lorraine said…

    Yeah, it's time... Time to move on to better and bigger things. Scary, though it may be, it is something I know that you are ready for. A new chapter, a new start, and really a new type of life. Love you always!

  • At 9:32 PM, August 04, 2005, Blogger humanesque said…

    first of all, thanks for your wonderful comment on my post. it was just what I needed, and in fact made my day. so thank you tremendously for that :)

    The path ahead may seem completely unknown and frightning, but stay optimistic. The unknown and frightning often turns out to hold the most beautiful things of all. This will be an adventure certainly, and most likely a fantastic one. and even if you are escaping Boulder, remember that if you need anything, you have lots of people here that love you and are always willing to be there for you. I wish you tons and oodles of luck Mercedes! I'll miss you, but I know that you'll have an amazing time wherever you go. Keep us updated on your journey; I know it'll be a fabulous one.
    much love!
    p.s., I adore that poem. eee.


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I am a marathoner. That means I have a tummy that could sieze a spider.